September 2011

Dear Friends,

It is taxing to be in different weather seasons within days. That is what has been happening to me in the last few weeks. Nonetheless, I enjoy it, I am challenged by it and I must deal with it. This is also quite an obvious rule when we travel. Patterns, colours, languages and temperatures change around us but they also do inside us. The inside part is the more difficult one to adjust to for me. Perhaps because I don’t see inside, I “only” feel. I can’t use my eyes to do that. What I look at on the outside of my person I seem to adjust to quicker. Don’t’ you think this is extraordinary? The “me” is what is closest to me, yet I re-organise my bearings faster in relation to the world outside myself?

The fascinating item about this conversation is how important it is to have some sense about us, about the body, the mind and the heart in us. The understanding we have about ourselves, the experience.

In the last few Newsletters I have talked about the connection with others. Right now I prefer to concentrate on us, on the individual. If I know what is going on inside me I will feel more confident about acting in the surrounding world. My inner landmarks will support me when dealing with weather, adversity, people and unexpected attitudes from others. If I integrate my inner self into my outside environment I will fare better than when I do the opposite: try and juggle my feelings without understanding them and not knowing who I am to myself when events in the outside world change suddenly and dramatically. It is essential for me to be more or less conscious of how I feel. I can then take care of what is happening outside of me in a much more relaxed way.

Most of us live in a community, around people, with neighbours and others whom we share time with, be it at work or in our leisure times. Amongst people we always gain from emotional, social and intellectual interactions. We can test our own sound foundations within our hearts and minds and ponder our reactions to what happens in conversation and specific situations. We learn to appreciate people and us better. We find out that for example the best peace brokers are not warmongers, but people with experience of war, emotions and basic human needs. We call these people knowledgeable in life skills. We all have these particular talents. How could we own these qualities if we didn’t know how we react to unexpected events in us? We call this ability common sense, awareness and considerate attitude.

My point is that self knowledge is paramount to knowing about society or others. Society existed before us; but when we came into it we had to familiarise ourselves with us before we dealt with society around us. We had to take a breath, yawn, sleep, eat and cry. We learned about our emotions. It is quite easy to gather that we must deal with ourselves first and with projects about humanity later.

Probably all of us remember situations where we adjusted easily and swiftly and others when it was much more complex and rough going. We may want to revise our skills. I believe we will make use of them more and more as our era is a rather violent and tough one with many a challenge involved. Let us not act in fear and with pain. Let us go forward with faith, perseverance and a generous amount of kindness.

As a story I have chosen “Restore your inner home”

We cannot learn how to become better internal housekeepers until we learn to accept the space that is inherently ours.

We all need a home and the universe provides this, free of charge, for each and every one of us long before we are ever born, long before our parents, and their parents and their parents were born – we each have our spot reserved just for us. This home is within us, around us, it is the scope of our vision, the depth of our feelings, the strength and the frailty of our thoughts. It is ours to claim and to it we must tend—each to our own.

We have all met people that seem larger than life – people who occupy more space than seems humanly possible, more space than most can ever imagine occupying. Conversely, many of us are consistently crawling into ourselves simply to avoid taking up any more space than is absolutely necessary – we actively try to avoid ‘bothering’ others with our own needs and desires. We want not to put others out. We politely, often quietly, insist we do not need anything, really.

In doing so, we unconsciously place our inner home on the market, “unused space for rent – apply within.” When we choose not to occupy our own space, something or someone will occupy it for us – leaving no room for personal growth, no room for self-love or self-discovery. No room for accurate reflection or quiet contentment. No room for peace or respect. No room for self-possession.

When we allow someone to take up more space, more time than we feel we have the right to occupy within our lives, we fail to acknowledge the importance of our part in that relationship – and in existence. This self-abnegation creates an imbalance within us and within the universe as a whole. And our whole world shifts creating chaos.

There are inhabitants within our soul and most of us require no rent. Some tenants are beautiful. They wait patiently with us, taking great care of the space within, adding to – not diminishing – our existence. And yet, some hope never to have us occupy our own space, our own time. At times, we willingly render ourselves insignificant for them. We become helpless in their occupation, if we choose to be, and we have. Nothing can prevent others from invading us, when we choose not to claim ourselves. Our space, our time is left open for the taking.

We are taught to contain our effect on the world, to “be-little” ourselves; to be small; to go out of our way to leave no trace behind. In doing so, we have left ourselves open to all kinds of abuse from others and from ourselves. It is not until we unlearn these lessons and begin to embrace our own importance that we can truly occupy as much space and time as we are worth—as we are afforded by our very existence. Then, and only then, will we be truly prepared to restore what is salvageable and find the courage to let go of what is not.

As a photo please look at this “inner world”

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In love and light and inner vision
Mariana